was wi only yesterday?

gosh it seems like a life time since i last posted but it was only yesterday, well technically the day before!!!

Last night (friday) was so much fun SP had an Hawaiian themed sleep over, bright coloured clothes, punch, buffett pizza (not hawaiian!) and good friends and gossip and general chat and laughter and other such merriment!!!

today saturday we went to the peels for lunch then me and tan went to bolton with "mum" so she could do payroll for her shop and we went and shopped in NL!!! got a skirt and a dress, the skirt is a bit to big so may take back tomorrow not tried the dress on yet!

i have burned today, although its been nice i didn't think it was that nice!!!

Got That Friday Feeling

Fresh start at 19st eeeekkkk

but i think wi on a friday will be good. i feel quite positive so fasr.

my main problems with food are once i'm at home

last night while i was waititng for my t to cook i had 3 slices of bread that was more points that my tea, that was lovely tesco healty living singapour noodles mmmmm 5.5 points then i had 3 fondent fancies !!!

Cunning Plan!!!

Friday is the new Monday!!!!!

MySpace Layouts

MySpace Layouts
MySpace Codes
MySpace Backgrounds

its almost a year till the wedding and i can not go on like this i know i keep going on and on, well now its time to put words into action!!!

i've always done wi on a sunday or a monday

but why? this is a hang over from going to classes, surely it makes more sense to have WI on my day off and its the end of the week so any weekend damage can be re-couped during the week!!!

so the decision has been made friday is a new fresh start!!!!

i need to do it same mini goals apply, not time scales for the time being but aim to have continual losses rather than gains!!!!1

exterminate exterminate

i wish i was a darlek, inside my metal suit, my fat could expand and it'd all be contained, if we were all darleks no-one would judge one an other as we'd all be the same on the outside.

i need desparatly to pull my finger out and get back on track, i'm thinking of re-joining a class but i'd have to be the one on friday mornings at the edgerton rooms and its on a bit early!!! 10am!!!

i have got 368 days till SP get married and i will have to see all the people from school at DK will have invited.

how much weight can i lose in that time?

realistically it can be 52lbs. 1lb a week

19st 3lbs (with me jeans on this am!!) so thats 269lbs -52lbs =217 (or 15.7stone) that could work



This is me now!!!!

ok action plan!! (how many of these have a done!)
Tomorrow WI 1st thing.

1st MG to get to 18st 6lbs (lowest weight last time - March time)
2nd MG to get to 18st 2lbs (lowest weight for a long time!)
3rd MG to get to 17st 13.5lbs!
4th MG 10% - to have lost 27lbs.

i'm still going from my last orignial start weigh from when this blog started as i have decided my fall off the wagin was a blip and this is a re-start not a brand new experience!!!

Inspiration

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5c22JCnMiq4

The House at Rivington Pike

as i keep wanting to call the book that i am reading.

i strated it this time last year, then gave up, which isn't normally like that but saying that its taken me almost 9 months to finish the last Kathy Riches book, its taken that long the day i finished it it came out in paperback!!!!

The re-start to my diet has done disaterously!!!! and now the scales have vanished, so i couldn't WI again!!! i forgot last week as i was so used to not W'ing In that i forgot!!! doh

but this weekend the old people where paying us a visit to see the new suite so it was en-masse tidy up and the scales where in the kitchen and now they have vanished!

i need to get back on track!

Topic : Some People

I posted this topic on 5+ board before

Just got the below message from someone on free dating.com!!!

best of it is he has no profile pic!!!


"No Offence Darling.

But you should go away and lose weight and then come back.

You look ruff! at least 40 looking.

Spend a little more time excersing and a little less time on your fat ar$e surfing the net and youll be fine."

i've reported it, but the cheeky sod!!! a message came up if other people report him he will be suspended!!! grrr

i'm not upset but angry, how dare he and with no profile pic i sent back a message but i'm regretting it now

i sent "Have you ever heard the saying

"if you can't say anything nice then don't say anything at all!"

i think you should take that into consideration before you send anyone else an offensive message, and you can talk not even putting a pic up!

GROW UP! "


I feel like shit!!! how dare people how dare he photoless london clubber!!!

but the messages of love and support i got of the 5+ers was amazing. you guys are fab!!!!

i need to move on from this but i keep thinking about it!!!

maybe the truth hurt maybe he's right but in the words of peter kay max and paddy styleeee "HOW DARE YOU!"

Don't Cry for me Argentina

It's evita day!!!and i can't wait!!!! i need to get some food as all i've had to eat today is some fruit salad sweets at granny wannys!!!

haha i knew those fruit salads would come back to haunt me!!! before i could get granny wanny out the house she was looking for some toffee's. not the ones she'd given to me and my mum the day before that we dumpt on the kitchen table!!! but some nice ones fruity ones!!! i had to confess that me and La Mama had demolished them this morning while we sent her to change into the dress we'd got her from debemhammy!!! its a pale background with teal, blue navy and beige spots in a random pattern, was a bargin £20 reduced from £40 then 20% off at the till.
it looks fab on her perfect for my "cousins" wedding ("cousin = my mums cousins daughter!) The Dress is like the one above just differnt colour and pattern!

Evita Evita Evita!!!! OMG this was fantastic!!! totally differnt from what i imagined, not like the film at all, but why would it be and how could it be!!! i got tingles in the opening scenes!!!
the Guy that played Che was Amazing, wasn't sure what to expect because i love Antonio as Che but Seamus Cullen was fab!!!! The Girl that played Eva was great as well, her singing was a bit piercing at times but its a big role and she did it proud!!!! :)
We had a bit of time to Kill before the Show started but not enough to go shopping se we had a wander up to albert sqaure, saw a statue of Abraham Lincoln, looking C'ést magnifique and in front of it is a garden memorial to Princess Diana. Such a shame, all the needed to do was scatter a pack of seeds, not even have bedding out plants, but no its a jumble of weeds and fag dimps!!! oh there is one solitary half dead pansy, come one Manchester council either do stuff properly or not at all!!!


so on we treck up and round towards peter street and we come across a kiddies play area and the panel below was so pretty i had to take a pic!!!



Oh Did i mention i got new glasses 2 pairs for dum dum dum £20!!! haha cheap skate i know!!! well they we're two pairs for £75 but cos i need them for the PC work contributed £55!!! so after a long battle with Spec savers to get a refund cos i PIF'd then work gave me the voucher i am the happy owner of 2 new pairs of glasses i'll put another pic of the other ones up another time!!!

OMG no more Doctor who till Xmas my husband is taking a well erned break, but i will miss him so!!! I had guessed / been told a few bits of what happend tonight, but it was fantastic and he is so beautiful, i won't talk much just in case anyone visits who's not seen it yet!!! if not why not, get on BBC Iplayer now, that is an ORDER!!!!

80 fat sausages sizzling in a pan

Well better in a pan than sitting on my bottom!!!!

Look how many of them there are!!!!!



so the Weight Loss Journey (WLJ) starts again.... yet again!!! OMG i need to do this, i need to lose weight. i'm not bothered about being skinny or thin.... all i want is to fit into nice clothes not be scared i won't fit on seats and to get a chap. Oh and to learn to like myself!!!!!

so even though the WLJ starts again i'm gonna use my original weight. i think i've said this before reason i'm doing this is because when i started my journy the last time i weighed 19st 7.5lbs!!! and the time beofore that iwas dead on 20st!!! eeeeekkkk thats scary to write down!!!A Very recent pic 10 points if you can guess what i was doing? Take 15/06/08 i'm 4082

in some ways i think about keeping my total from that 20st but its such a scary figure for me!!! i don't think i ever looked 20stone, but what does it look like!!!?? 2240suasages!!! eh is that right????
i digress... so WLJ take (errr 7?) is beginning again from 19st 7.5lbs so that means as of Monday morning i have lost 10lbs!!!! = 80 sauasages!!!!! is this right can someone confirm this for me????

New mini goals:

1: to get back to the lowest weight of my last WLJ = 18 st 6lbs
2: to get to the lowest weight i can ever remeber being for a long time!!!! = 18st 2lbs!!!
3: to get under 18 stone = 17st 13.5lbs
4: to get to my 10% = 17st 8.5lbs (need to double check this)

ASA reply!

I got a reply after my complaint about the pink patch! they are already investigating and will let me know!!!


got belly ache today surly can't be TOTM already? was last on when i had my week off work, that was only last week or the week before!!!

going working up with ACCU for a couple of days next week, looking forward to it, it'll be good to build bridges and put names to faces !!!!

plus its two night in a hotel

OMG - do people really beleive this

just been on facebook and there was an ad on the side for the pink patch bosting lose 2st in 20 days and a pic there is no way 2 stone loss caused the change in his person if inface it is the same person
This sort of advertising makes me so mad!!! no wonder woman feel pressued to try quick fixes!!!

there is no way in a million years wold i ever try this product and i would encourage anyone thinking about it to stop and try your local slimming club!!!

TARDIS has landed 06/02/08

well thats where my weigh gain has taken me back to and i need to come back with avengence!!!!

Reasons to lose weight!!!

to re-gain control
to feel better
to have enegy
to complete next years race for life in under an hour!!!
to meet a man (sad but true!)
This man will do!!! haha

i've decided i'm not starting again from my current weight but gonna still do my weight loss from my original re-start weigh which i think was 19st 7lbs may be 7.5lbs will need to double check

this may be a cheet but i wanna keep my 10% the same!!! haha

Oh BTW i did my race for life on 15th june my friends just mailed me some picks from it here's one!!!!

i'm back!!!

well it's been awhile and i'm back.

been re-visiting the 5+ board and think i've found my mojo again. i've just made my lunch for tomorrow... ham salad!!! we have no bread so i might try and just have the salad


we've also got strawberries and low fat yougurt!!!


me at uni - i'm the one in the paler top!

Avoidence

I don't know whats up with me, i feel angry and miserbale all the f'in time!!!!!! i got sooooo pissed off today, i got a messge inviting me for tea, but i couldn't go mainly because i's already got stuff out for tea and it was my fave tea. so even though she "lied " to me for months re the D, she requested a full explination as to why!!!! the later on i got another text summoning me to here after tea!!!! not do u want to comne to mine later, it was come to mine after tea!!!! grrrrr if she'd have worded it differntly then i would have gone but no, i put my foot down and bit my nose off to spite my face.... ...... at this moment in time i do not want to spend 5 days in polando with her. i want to curl up in a ball and cry and screem and grrrrr.

i kinda just want to avoid everyone and i don't know why, i think its the taurean side of me, when i am told to do somwthing i run and do the opposite.

ok so as this is a diet blod, here goes, i avoided the scales, quitely becuase i was stiill drunk at wi times, i'd already eaten by wi time then i went for as bath and had a nap and then it was tea time

this week so far i feel fat and uglyier than ever before. and i know this weeks wi isn't gonna be a good one.

something i think i'm never gonna get my life under control.

organised

i am getting closer to be organised for Polando. i have bought a new coat and boots, and got some tops to layer up. need to start making list of what i need to pack.

i also need to get my ass in gear and get back on track with this ww makary. i for got to WI this morning. only excuse i have is that i think i may still be drunk from last night!!!!!!!

one of my mates wants to go out agin, i don't think i can face it and the state of the pics of me on face book!!! OMG what was i doing!!!

wo is me

hi,

i've been a bit quite of lately, mainly because i have nothing to report. ww has fallen by the way side. and i realy need to get back on the wagon. cos i know it works.

i have just been eating what i want when i like and i have been feeling really heavey ( i know i am heaqvy anyway but just withing myself) i \m sluggish no enery motivation or desire to do anything remotely good.

the only exercise i'm doing in playing on the wii!!!!!!!!!!


i need to drag my arse out of bed and go and do something useful!!!!! like order my currency for polando!!!!

2nd mini goal achived

at long last i got my 1st stone, so 2nd mini goal slate is clear!!!

had a well busy weekend to tired to write much, so off to watch skating on ice results then sleep til morning!!!

ASDA NSV

Me and mama called at asda living on the way home and when i was wandering round looking for her i saw NSV!!! huuuu isn't that a ww phrase!!! so i toddled round for a bit and went for another look and too be sure it was a NSV of their very own!!! sadly not a non scales victory!!! but never the less!!! i had to take a pic, thank the lord for camera phones!!! what did we do without them!!!! :)

looking through the window of hope

I thought i'd scan the pics out of my WW journal as i have mentioned them a few times, i thought i'd let everyone else see them as well

as you may have guessed i'm not the worlds best scanner but you get the general idea

1) this is my count down to my Holiday. when we booked out jolly jaunt to Krakow we had 12 weeks to go, so i have made 12 columns and each week i give myself a sticker to sat how much i have lost that week.
2) this is the count down to getting my 10%. I have divided 27 squares in to half lbs and each week i colour in the relevant number of lbs lost!!!
3) this was count down to my 1st mini goal 7lbs!!! for each 1lb i gave myself a star.


4) this is the count down to my 2nd mini goal 14lbs! still 1.5lbs to lose but i decided as i tend to lead myself up the garden path why not use this as a way to record the lbs lost.

i have a little foot print stamp and i put one in the book for each half lb lost!

i will tidy up and crop these pics at some stage but that will be later **edit - have cropped them now!**


Measurements:

while i have the book out i thought i may as well let you know my measurements for jan and feb:

	11.01.08	11.02.08
Neck	17.5	17.5
Bicep	15	15
Chest	43	42
Waist	46.5	45.5
Hips	51	50.5
Thigh	28	27
Calf	19	18

so there has been a small change!!!

after a long absence here is a weight loss entry

as it is offically the last day of feb today i thought i would do an quick update on my ww journey as per the reason for this blog!

Jan Weight Loss: 5.5lbs
Feb Weight Loss: 7lbs!!!
total loss for the year so far: 12.5lbs !!!!!

didn't think 12.5lbs sounded a lot but when u break it down per month it doesn't seem too bad!!!

can't say i've noticed much difference in myself.

i've had one NSV, my jeans from NL now fit with the aim of a belt!!!

feb progress pics are up not sure of the exact date would have been around the 11th (measuring day!) these were taken and they are hideous if i remeber i might take some more tonight!!!

ops forgot to take more pics ans seen as it is now 1.30 am its is officially march 1st!!!

where has this year gone!!

as i mentioned in an earlier post i have also taken pics of myself in my swimming costume i have these in a photo album but i have also put them on a word doc so i can line up each new pic under the previous one and although on the latest clothed pics i actually look bigger!! think its just the choice of outfits cos i can see a difference in the other pics!!! Phew i was beginning to feel worried

i have got feb measurements to post but they are in my paper journal which is up stairs so i might go and look for that, not looked at that for 2 weeks cos i stayed the same last week, i had nothing to update in it!!! but fingers crossed for sunday.

to be honest its not looking hopeful but all we can do is wait!!!

i have made myself a play list for the old Ipod so that i have exercise motivating music in an imagintaly titled play list "stuff"

1. Rock Star Nickelback
2. Sweet Dreams (Are Made of This) Eurythmics
3. Hands The Raconteurs
4. Space Cowboy N'sync
5. LET'S HEAR IT FOR THE BOY Deniece Williams
6. place your hands reef
7. Shoot the Runner Kasabian
8. I Predict a Riot Kaiser Chiefs
9. Hey there Delilah Plain White T's
10. good vibrations The Beach Boys
11. build me up buttercup The Foundations
12. Love Shack The B-52's
13. Who's That Girl? Eurythmics
14. Bang Bang You're Dead Dirty Pretty Things
15. Monkey Gone to Heaven Pixies
16. road rage catatonia
17. Londons calling The clash
18. Life On Mars? David Bowie
19. Rebel Rebel David Bowie
20. Ashes To Ashes David Bowie
21. in a room dodgy
22. away from here the Enemy
23. The Great Pretender Freddie Mercury
24. trains to brazil guillemots
25. Worried about ray The Hoosiers
26. lust for life iggy pop
27. Move Your Feet Junior Senior
28. Everyday I Love You Less and Less Kaiser Chiefs
29. Thinking About Your Love Kenny Thomas
30. Mr. Brightside The Killers
31. She Moves in Her Own Way The Kooks
32. house of fun Madness Happy
33. there she goes the LA's C
34. Big Girl (You Are Beautiful) Mika
35. CancerMy Chemical Romance
36. Welcome to the Black Parade My Chemical
37. come as you are Nivarna
38. Bright Idea Orson
39. Baby, I Love Your Way Peter Frampton
40. Don't Stop Me Now Queen
41. Hips don't lie Shakira
42. panic the smiths
43. ghoast town the specials
44. up the junction squeeze
45. Shine Take That!!!!
46. dancing in the moonlight toploader
47. i am the resurrection the stone roses!!!

there are three more songs but must have deleted them by accident!!!

spent the early evening watching old house DVD's and i have decided that i love hugh laurie even more than i did before!!! quite an odd crush, but he has defo improved with age, been watcheing old blackadders and he was so geeky looking back then but soooo funny!!!

Friday

evening,

well the dental saga continues, the dentist thinks my tooth is dead or dying... (RIP tooth) he can't tell properly cos when he blew cold air at it i had no sensitivity to it, but when he tapped it with a metal object there was quite a lot of sensitivity (i'd like to have seen him try that on Wednesday i'd have screamed the place down!) he's given me some antibiotics and painted on some sensitivity coating.

he didn't charge me, which was unexpected, but what he did say was that i may need to have root canal work done or an extraction, he's made me book a 20 min appointment but the 1st available on a Friday was 28th march, but when i got home i realised it just before i go to Poland, so i might have to ring up and get it put back another week or 2!!! but then it will be really close to going to Malta. oh what to do what to do!! if i have it done before i go away with the girls the likely hood is i'm gonna feel miserable and in pain all week and be on antibiotics so i can't enjoy the vodka!!!! we will see how it goes, hopefully it will settle down!!!

but u know when you get the feeling that this is just the tip of the iceberg!

EARTHQUAKE!!!!!!!!

you may mock, but last night at 12.56pm an earthquake that measured 5.2 on the richter scale hit britain.

the epicenter was in Market Rasen in Lincolnshire. i did wake up at 1am but don't think i felt anything, 2 of my friends said they felt it, lamps / CD's etc fell over!, my rooms is such a tip i really wouldn't have noticed any difference!!!


this earthquake was equal size to

Nagasaki atomic bomb

according to Wikipedia in any case!!!! so that seems pretty big to me!!!!

Dentist Part 3

haha what did i say about it not being as bad as expected!!! i've been in constant pain since friday!!! ended up phoning in sick today, the pain and suffering appears to be getting worse!!! i haven't eaten properly since thrudays, i feel ill at the thought of food / drink touching my teeth!!!

i called the dentist this am and they said to come in but i can't get there as its in bloody bolton! typical! i've got a doc appointment but doubt they will be able to do much good!

PART II
the doc couldn't really do owt for me teeth!!! (god how northern is that!) but she the kind kind doc has given me a pic fat perscription of dicalfenic woooohoo!!! sad but true the though of strong drugs makes me happy. normally i'd hate to have to take them but at this moment in time and having taken my 2nd one of the day they bloody work!!!

the dentist has phoned back and wants to see me, so no doubt they will charge me! going in at 10.40am on friday. hoping to feel well enough to go back to work tomorrow, go so much to do and with having those 5 days off last week i feel so behind!!! plus its MDB's birthday on thursday and i want to celebrate it with him!

i feel like all i'm doing is moaning on the 5+ board so think i'm gonna lurk and not post for a while.

xxxx

Dentist Trip

Was no where near as bad as expected!!! Phew! had to have those bits of brace removed, the bottom left one came off no problem, but the top right hand one had to be ground off as it had an orthodontic band round the tooth which is designed to never come off!!!

i also had to have two fillings, not bad to say not been to the dentist for 10 years or so (might be 8 years now i come to think of it!) he took some x-rays and did a scale and polish, so my 2 front teeth look 100times better, most of the brown stains have been removed just a bit left on a number 2 tooth!!! so now i can smile with my gob open!!!

i have to go and see the hygienist in 3 months as i have some mild gum disease, he said cleaning the gums more should fix it but he wants me to have a proper scale and polish and look into having veneers done, at first i was quite interested (before he'd done the scale and polish!) but 1 i don't think i could take the pain 2 i'd have to have it done privately and think it will be quite expensive.

he did the injections then went on to remove the brace and the pain killer / numbness kicked in pretty much straight away. i didn't feel anything but the vibration while he was drilling my tooth. (thank god!!)

but now i have tooth ache in every tooth on the right side of my mouth. my mum said that was cos of the jab, but i'm not convinced. i had to go to bed when i came home cos the pain even with pain killers is not going down. he said my gum would be a bit sore which it is but the tooth ache!!!!

i'll give it a couple of days and give em a call.

i'm still not sure i was ment to go, cos he said he was gonna check my x-rays to see if i needed any more fillings while i was there but i don't know if he did. he gave me a card to take to reception to book another appointment, i'm sure he ment i could leave but you know when you have that nagging doubt at the back of your mind, and only 2 fillings for 8-10 years of no dentist visits doesn't seem right, Mr Khan used to like giving me fillings for fun!!!

Dentist!!!! Arrrrrrrgggggggggghhhhhhhhh!!!

I have a dentist appointment at 13.40 tomorrow!!! i had my 1st appointment for 10 years a few weeks ago and i know i need a lot doing!!! but i need to bite the bullet and get it over and done with!!!

tomorrow is a 40 min appointment as i still have 2 pieces of my fixed brace attached to my teeth and they have to be ground off before the dentist can do x-rays and find out the true state of my teeth!!!!

ohhhh why did i not go for so long!!!

hindsight is such a wonderful thing!!!!!!

i am sooooooooooooooooooooooooo scared, part of me things to cancel the appointment and just wait till all my teeth fall out!!!

but no i can't do that part of my 2008 plan is to face my fears as well as shift a bulk of this excess weight!!!!

fears to face include the dentist and driving instructor!!!!!

i need to book some lessons, but still too scared!!!!! wish i could win the lottery and get a chauffeur !!!

OMG!!!!!!! how did this happen!!!

On the 5+ board on WW tonight one of the girls put on a message about finding an old "fat" photo of herself well this is my most horrendous pic that i can find!!!!

and found by accident, was looking for dodgy pics of Mama to stick up at work for her birthday and found this pic from when i graduated my PGCE summer '06. i almost cried when i saw it... and did a few mins after. not cos of this pic but cos it was with the old photo albums with pics of me being 0-5 and i was soooooo skinny arms like twigs and i looked at the difference and wonder how in 20 years i went from that to this!!! Thank God some of this weight is off. i was just gonna put this on for a short while but i think i needs to stay on as a reminder of where i have been and where not to go again!!!

after i came back home i did re-join ww for about 6 months and lost 23lbs, but had to stop going cos of work shifts and put all the weight bar 6.5lbs back on!!

still i never want to go back there again!!!

Freedom 2008

Pic : Maltese sky!!

I am free, free as a bird. well till Monday anyway!!!

I've had to use some of my holidays up from work as they will only let me carry 37 hours to next years allocation!!!

so i have booked Wednesday (tomorrow) and Saturday so that means i get 5 days off for the price of 2 days holiday!!! can't be bad!!!!

Wed - Holiday
Thurs - NDO
Friday - RDO
Sat - Holiday
Sun - Non-working day!!!

woooo hoooo!!!!

Positive thought

Holiday to Poland 6 weeks to go
Holiday Malta 11 weeks to go!!!


MINI GOAL REVIEW!!!
As i have missed my 1st two mini goals 1st only took me and extra week to get and my 2nd is 1.5lbs away i have decided to amend my mini goals

i now realise 2st in 12 weeks was a tad optimistic!!!

so new goals are:
MG1: 7lbs - achieved
MG2: 14lbs - 24/02/08
MG3: 21lbs 30/03/08 (Poland)
BMG4 28lbs &10% 04/05/08 (Malta)

Week 6 - Lost 1lb ---(coupledom)

Evening!

well WI 6 and i lost another 1lb!!! yipppeee, i have once again missed my mini goal target, but at least it's insight. its over there by the horizon and hopefully i will be with it this time next week!!!

so 12.5lbs lost so far!!!!

What i want to write about today is couples. Yes i am a sad singleton and will never be coupled up but everywhere i have been i keep seeing happy couples!!! its driving me into a strange depression. i'm trying to put a brave face on it and just get on with it. but i feel so lonely.

Last night i was at my mates house and even though there was 3 of us chatting, i felt so alone! i typed a text to myself saying:

"how can someone feel so lonely when surrounded by friends!"

and i honestly don't know the answer. i think part of it coming from my best friend(such a childish phrase but it'll do) has started dating a guy we have know for many years. i am happy for her, but i think because she kept it hidden from me for such a long time, and i understand her reason and i don't blame her. But now i feel we have lost part of our connection.

back to what i was saying... couples overload, when i was waiting for my friend yesterday there were two bird snuggled up in the ariels across the road, that's what the pic is off, i know its hard to make out but only had camera phone on me!

i went to the gym on friday and today (sunday) and i'm going swimming tomorrow night 9pm -10pm with my friend and her fella.

so gym bunny may be rearing its ugly head.

i really need to get in shape as i have fully signed up to do race for life!!! and i already have £15 worth of sponcership money!

Valentines Day

Another year another Valentines Day! I bloody hate this day, i'm not bothered that i'm alone and i didn't get a card or a present. But the left outness i feel, the feeling of pitying looks. the bloody chatter about it being valentines day alll bloody day long, its a commercialised day to make us feel bad and spend cash!!! 90% chances are even if i was with someone i still wouldn't have got a hearts and flowers.

today listening to people at work chatter made me feel really sad and lonely and felt like i couldn't join in and none of it was done to deliberately leave me out but grrrrrrr. it was so nice after everyone left at 4pm and me, Ian and Karen, could just get on with work and have a chat, when i was talking to them if felt like a totally other day, no Valentines talk, no serious talk, just generl chit chat and drunken night out chat, but if felt nice.

Tomorrow is my Day off and i feel it is well deserved, its been a bloody long week. I am dreading WI, i think last weeks miraculous loss is going to be over shadowed by a very large gain cloud!! but it is TOTM. came on just as i WI last sunday and feel really heavy.I haven't really gone over / under points but i just think that last week is gonna catch up on me!!!!

Pic 14/02/08 Home

earlier on tonight i watched a programme on BBCThree, where this 18yr old girl was addicted to sausages and she consummed 3 x the average persons salt in take for a year, 36ltrs of fat a year and sooo much charcole that it was in danger of giving her cancer.

it was really good, they tried to re-educate her palete, it was quite sad really as she had no idea of where food came from (ie nature! not ASDA!!!) she though processed sausaged looked more like proper meat that a pork chop.

she did really well in the end. i need that kind of thing. but i enjoy fruit and veg and the right sort of food, i think i'm addicted to bread and giving it up for Lent has been a fab idea. i've thought loads of times oooh i'l just have a slice and not done.

i admit that i have cheated twice and my excuses are below!

cheat 1: Tuesday i'd only had 12 points up to 9pm and needed to use some so i went into the kitchen and looked but we only had bread in!!! so i had 4 yes 4 slices of warbies granary loaf with a banana!!! the plan was to have 2 slices toasted but before the toast popped i'd devoured 2 slices dry!!!!

cheat 2: we got caught up in all the leftover traffic jams after that awful crash on the M61 ON Wednesday night coming home from work, so we detoured to burnen park asda and we were so hungry we bought WW butties!!!

BUT on a positive note i really wanted some bread tonight after i'd watched the addicts programme but instead i have strawberries and cherries!!! the ones in the photo!!!! :)

How Did My Feet Get So Dirty?

Graph Wk 0-5. its getting there!!!

I didn't think my mini goals were achievable a couple of days ago and was going to change them but if i can lose 2.5lbs this week i will be back on track, get to my 1st stone and over (only just) halfway to my 10% (27lbs)






I had such a good night out last night with 3 of my friends but when i woke up my feet were manky... not seen this this dirty for a long time. i thought i would share the picture !!!

i only notices when i stood on the scales for WI!!!! what the boody hell did i do.... i've looked at my shoes and they seem clean!!!???? the mysteries of drunkenness!!!







Pic 10.02.08 In Tokyo Project Oldham. i actually like this pic of myself.

that was one thing that i want to get out of WW is to look at a photo of myself and not be disgusted with myself!

and i'm one step closer... Black and white is defo a good look for me!!!

last night was such a good laugh. we went to some pubs near my house then into Oldham.


then i had pie chips and peas on my why home and i have a feeling prawn crackers where had as well but i can't be 100% sure!!! woops!!!

but never the less i had a fab WI result this morning!!!! i lost 4lbs so that brings me up to 11.5lbs total loss in 5 weeks, i'm also in to the next stone bracket (18's) and feel so much better.

although i have re-measured and i don't appear to have lost even half an inch! hmmm! i'm gonna do an official measure tomorrow night so i'll confirm then.

This afternoon i walked to the CO-OP and back... it's been such a nice day, the crocuses are out and the sun was shining, i realised how pretty my area actually is!

i took a couple of pics of the flowers in the church yard at the end of my road.