010809 the date and what i thought was 3 peoples meter readings today

its  been a long long day!!! worked 8am -6pm they kept saying we could come off but keep an eye every time i started on my own work my phone was in red!!! i tried my best for leads i missed a few and a couple wern't appropriate, i had a one to one yesterday and its such hard work with my TM every time we have a meeting i end up in tears mainly cos we have meetings when i am ill and she thinks i am always ill, but yesterday i had tooth ache and ear ache (both of which i still have!!!) i just feel very frustrated at the moment and after our last meeting where she has told me i am not allowed to get frusteated well thats getting me down i know no other way to channel how i'm feeling other than crying / screaming the only other realistic option is bottleing thing up which is what i am doing and then it poors out in tears, i meantioned that i am not going to get involved in this CHC activity decorating the team as no one is interested so i volunteered so we didn't look miserable, we got a shit theme so i picked us a knew one after asking the team no-one seemed very bothered so i sorted stuff out then they all said oh we should have been the oblivion can you just do this can you just do that. i decided we'd be a candy floss stall so i got pics of stuff bought real sweets and glue and cut and made giant lollys i stuck some stuff to the window literally plonked it there and the one person who keeps moaning and staying she's not interested decided they'd be better lower on the window i wasn't offenced i just said well move them i've got to do some work but she didn't move them then wheni came back in after my day off she's moved them. one of the teams up stairs is a burger van and they have candy floss and sweets as well as chips n burgers and it looks god but mailnly cos the whole team has got involved one peropsn on my team was telling me how good it looked insinuating my decorating looks shit, i just said i give up i'm not doing any more. i've told my tm i'm not participating and i know you can't motivate and make people join in 247 but i feel like i am the only one doing stuff then i get critised for it i can't win and she basically told me to get over myself but ok part of it might be me being a bit para but i am sick of the negitivity

i had to say what areas i want to develop in so i put i might wanna do reporting but not sure so my tm said she wants to know for defo, i kinda do but i don't want the responsibility i've got all the process maps to do so i've said its somthing that i'd like to do in teh future.

sorry i'm sure that was all boring for anyone reading but u know when you have to get stuff off your chest!!
On
to mor intersting things, my Papa bought wii sport Island and OMG it is
so much fun, we played as a family last night and even though i didn't
feel well i still played a bit and i've not laughed so much in ages
then tonight after work i played for an hour or 2 on it just me as no
one else would play.

there is alsorts of gaes and it really pust what the wii is all about into proactice and it came iwth the new wii attachmentr to make the wii remote more sensitive not sure how much difference this makes but i'll  give it a go with out the attachment tomorrow.

games include Wake board - like water skiking on a board, basket ball, frisbee, cycling, sword play, golf, table tennis (i <3 this) and more i'm suree oh bowling 10 pin and 100 pin bowling (i love this as well!!)

its daft i have been feeling so ill and miserable and i still do a bit but after playing and laughing at myself i feel a hell of a lot better. what i don't think has help i have been self sabotaging and eating shit , telling myself its ok cos all i want to lost is ½lb but i'll be bloody lucky if i only gain 2lbs this week, althought i have done a bit more exercise it is in no way anything to write home about.

so all i can do is be good tomorrow and monday and hope fir the best!!!
The motion plus thats whats its called!!!! i had taken some pics of my Mii in action yes and i am that sad but sadly i can' get them to load so i have stolen these images from somehere i found on google!!!
well as i can't get these pics to behave how i want and i have seen 2 films tonight that are not what i wanted to watch i think i am gonna go and try and sleep!"!!


TTFN xxxx